Saturday, April 12, 2014

Keeping It Real (#atozchallenge)

At the beginning of the week I argued that frustration is the root of all evil, but I think I've changed my mind. It's expectations.

Think about it. What causes disappointment? Unmet expectations. What ruins relationships? Unaligned expectations.

Unrealistic expectations.

Unexpected joy.
Nothing like it.
I can remember dozens of moments of unexpected happenings that gave me incredible joy. But I can't think of a single instance where having expectations--not ambition, mind you, or dreams, or goals; expectations--has ever resulted in me feeling good. Expectations beget sulking.

It's my birthday. Why didn't you bring me breakfast in bed?

And if the guy/gal did, then it's Why didn't you bring a long-stemmed rose with the tray? That's what I bought that miniature vase for, you dimwit.

And if the rose was brought, then But it has thorns. Didn't you learn that you never ever give a rose with thorns? Don't you know that it means (whatever the language of flowers say it means)?

Expectations, by their very nature, create dissatisfaction.

This is Romy & her mom.
Her story makes Cinderella's look mundane.
And who wants to live unsatisfied?

Look at your dog. No expectations. Hope, yes. They live in hope; eternal, undying hope. But s/he is happy--satisfied--with whatever you give. Sure s/he wants you to come home, but when you do, even if it's three AM, the joy at seeing you is never marred by a sulk. If you forget to feed him/her, s/he won't hold it against you for the remainder of his/her life. S/he's doesn't expect you to produce food, and every time you do, s/he's amazingly happy--and grateful--that you did. And if you don't, no hard feelings.

(Which makes you feel, of course, all the more guilty and horrible for being six minutes late with dinner.)

Expectations are the enemy of gratitude. And forgiveness. And those... Well, they're the key to bliss.

Thanks for the visit. Your comments make my day :)
Happy A-to-Z-ing!

14 comments :

  1. Oh my gosh, that is all so true. Why can't we all be more like our dogs,

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    1. Exactly... The world would be so much better--and happier :)

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  2. So true! My kiddos always "expect" regular meals *pfft* Lucy *our border collie sidekick* is thrilled with a bit of crushed ice *and she listens better, too:)

    WriterlySam
    Echoes of Olympus
    A to Z #TeamDamyanti

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    1. This is the reason (well, one of them) I don't have kids :D Thanks for the visit, Sam!

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  3. You are so right! I think of the dogs on a morning when someone might have to go to the vet for a procedure, and can't eat. They expect breakfast but when it doesn't come, after a few minutes they just go back to bed and forget about it. I wouldn't take it that well if I was expecting breakfast and no one gave it to me!
    Jan, Wag 'n Woof Pets

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    1. Perfect example, Janet. Nope, I wouldn't be happy about that either--I get all grumpy and nasty when my expectations aren't met :D Thanks for the visit!

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  4. I think my dogs live by the unwritten beatitude (as should I) - Blessed is he who expecteth nothing, for he shall not be disappointed

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    1. As should we all, Keith. As should we all :) Thanks for the visit!

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  5. Dogs are wonderful friends! I loved your comment on my blog, but my fat finger accidentally rejected it on the iPad. Sorry :(

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  6. Great post! We should definitely learn to be more like our dogs. :)

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  7. I love that picture of Romy and her mom! Dogs are awesome. Mine is cowering from the rain right now, sadly. She does NOT like thunder. :)

    Stopping by from A-Z; thanks for visiting my blog too!

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  8. I loved this Guilie. 'Expectation' is one of those words that causes such problems. I hear people say 'I expected that my partner would be ... (fill in the gap); 'I expected that my job would bring me ... ' ... It's such a loaded word. The only thing worthwhile expecting is the unexpected ..
    Lovely ending - the enemy of gratitude is expectations.
    Thank you!

    Garden of Eden Blog

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  9. Completely agree with you on this! Expectations lead to disappointments many a times in life! And pets are the most selfless and lovely beings of us all!

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  10. I love this. And I totally agree with you about expectations. It never turns out well.

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